This first week back is already so hectic and crazy. From new teachers and classes to dance placements to freshmen moving in to turning in projects to everything in between, it's actually been difficult to find time to do things.
When I arrived Sunday afternoon I wasn't at the Strat for any more than an hour when I got a text from Ben asking if I was back yet (so cute). So I went to his room and we just hung out and talked and joked around for a while before I left. Then last night (Monday night) he texted me telling me to come over and hang out with him so I did for a bit but he was exhausted. Btw he just cut his hair and he was lying in bed with a black wife beater on, and I swear he has got to be the most attractive person I've ever known. It is so hard for me to cuddle with him and stare at him so close and not completely lose control. Props to me. Anyways we kind of just talked and cuddled for 20 minutes before I left. And then tonight he texted me at 8:30 but I was napping so I responded when I woke up and went over to his room from 11:30-1:00. And all we did was lie there cuddling. And I kissed him a couple times but he wouldn't open his lips because he didn't want to start anything. Which, again, is so difficult because ....well imagine it! There's the person you are most attracted to inches from your face staring into your eyes (you also like them a lot) and you just had a 10 day break which makes it feel as if you haven't seen them in forever. I haven't updated this blog in a while because I've kind of been waiting for something interesting to happen, but for the time being we're just on (a wonderfully happy) autopilot, so there's no real updates for the time being.
It's almost 3:00 I should probably go to bed. Haha Matt's snoring. I'm do glad that he and I are on good terms again. Well I'll write about that on my other blog right now, then I'll sleep. Gnight my selected army of faithful blog-followers =)
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
The Golden Era (Part 3)
After that kiss I spent the night in his room. On October 29th. The next day I spent the night in his room. October 30th. The next day I spent the night in his room. October Halloweenth. This continues for exactly three weeks straight.
The best part wasn't even the cuddling under the covers, or everything that happened between climbing in bed and falling asleep (every single night. hellz yeah), or even waking up and coming to consciousness to see him still sleeping next to me (although that was pretty fantastic). The best part was that we spent three weeks of learning each other. Asking questions and talking about childhoods and families back home. Eight parents, dead stepdad, and lost birthfather meets uptight family, screw-up brother, and arrogant dad.
He's such a beautiful soul. And I don't know why I believe that so strongly; his description of himself left a lot to be desired, if I really think about it. The first thing I learned about him is that he's spoiled. He literally gets a new phone like...every day. Okay not literally. Anyways when he wants something, he calls his mom. She usually buys it. He has internet in his room, an awesome phone, a Macbook and an iPad2, ...you get the picture. He also explained to me how superficial his town/parents are. He lives somewhere outside of Boston, I forget the name of the actual place, but everyone knows everyones' business. And the way his family acts is very stereotypical nouveau riche. Make sure the Christmas tree looks good in the window, who cares what presents are underneath? That sort of thing. Also his brother- apparently he and his brother hated each other forever. Basically the parents kicked his brother out of the house for being a dick to Ben. Making Ben the favorite child. Which, and this is so weird, but I think is amazingly adorable. I know everyone's supposed to hate the spoiled brat, the diva that gets more than what she deserves, and in a way that is Ben, but at the same time he's so...perfect? Maybe I'm just blinded by his cuteness. And the fact that he grew up in a screwed up town and came out on top is so strong and just...sexy? Maybe I shouldn't be blogging about him late at night in my bed. Anyways, the fact that he's spoiled is one of my favorite parts about him. Because it means I get to spoil him. I massage his feet, his hands, his shoulders, I crack his back, I...well....fill in the blanks. I love spoiling him. It's the best. He's the best.
Wow. Anyways. That's basically what our relationship grew to. Not that I'm the only one that gives, I don't want it to sound like a one-sided relationship. He's sweet. And he sent me cute texts. And technically he provided me with shelter for three weeks straight, so that's something. Oh and he bought me dinner! Being theater kids with no money (meaning I have no money) we can't really afford fancy meals that often. But Ben and I walked to this place on Broadway called ________. Of course I forget the name now. Anyways he paid for my meal. And it was so sweet. Ugh God he's great. Okay.
Throughout the relationship we would text each other things like "I'm so glad I have you." and "You're such an amazing person." Things that started out as cute little pick-me-up texts and eventually turned into some pretty heavy sentiments. It's ridiculous how quickly things picked up. But love knows no time limitations.
It was a perfect three weeks, honestly one of the greatest times of my life. Somebody that I had liked for a long time finally came out of the closet to me, and on top of that told me he likes me and was willing to break up with his girlfriend for me!! That's huge! Now imagine that plus three weeks of constantly spending time together, all the while learning step-by-step that this person could legitimately be the one. And each day was just better than the last.
Truly, an amazing three weeks.
The best part wasn't even the cuddling under the covers, or everything that happened between climbing in bed and falling asleep (every single night. hellz yeah), or even waking up and coming to consciousness to see him still sleeping next to me (although that was pretty fantastic). The best part was that we spent three weeks of learning each other. Asking questions and talking about childhoods and families back home. Eight parents, dead stepdad, and lost birthfather meets uptight family, screw-up brother, and arrogant dad.
He's such a beautiful soul. And I don't know why I believe that so strongly; his description of himself left a lot to be desired, if I really think about it. The first thing I learned about him is that he's spoiled. He literally gets a new phone like...every day. Okay not literally. Anyways when he wants something, he calls his mom. She usually buys it. He has internet in his room, an awesome phone, a Macbook and an iPad2, ...you get the picture. He also explained to me how superficial his town/parents are. He lives somewhere outside of Boston, I forget the name of the actual place, but everyone knows everyones' business. And the way his family acts is very stereotypical nouveau riche. Make sure the Christmas tree looks good in the window, who cares what presents are underneath? That sort of thing. Also his brother- apparently he and his brother hated each other forever. Basically the parents kicked his brother out of the house for being a dick to Ben. Making Ben the favorite child. Which, and this is so weird, but I think is amazingly adorable. I know everyone's supposed to hate the spoiled brat, the diva that gets more than what she deserves, and in a way that is Ben, but at the same time he's so...perfect? Maybe I'm just blinded by his cuteness. And the fact that he grew up in a screwed up town and came out on top is so strong and just...sexy? Maybe I shouldn't be blogging about him late at night in my bed. Anyways, the fact that he's spoiled is one of my favorite parts about him. Because it means I get to spoil him. I massage his feet, his hands, his shoulders, I crack his back, I...well....fill in the blanks. I love spoiling him. It's the best. He's the best.
Wow. Anyways. That's basically what our relationship grew to. Not that I'm the only one that gives, I don't want it to sound like a one-sided relationship. He's sweet. And he sent me cute texts. And technically he provided me with shelter for three weeks straight, so that's something. Oh and he bought me dinner! Being theater kids with no money (meaning I have no money) we can't really afford fancy meals that often. But Ben and I walked to this place on Broadway called ________. Of course I forget the name now. Anyways he paid for my meal. And it was so sweet. Ugh God he's great. Okay.
Throughout the relationship we would text each other things like "I'm so glad I have you." and "You're such an amazing person." Things that started out as cute little pick-me-up texts and eventually turned into some pretty heavy sentiments. It's ridiculous how quickly things picked up. But love knows no time limitations.
It was a perfect three weeks, honestly one of the greatest times of my life. Somebody that I had liked for a long time finally came out of the closet to me, and on top of that told me he likes me and was willing to break up with his girlfriend for me!! That's huge! Now imagine that plus three weeks of constantly spending time together, all the while learning step-by-step that this person could legitimately be the one. And each day was just better than the last.
Truly, an amazing three weeks.
Zero
That's the number of text messages I had from him when I turned on my phone this morning. Also surprisingly that's how much I cared. I feel safe, I feel like I know he likes me. I don't need constant proof. Which is a good thing, because it's finally settled in.
Also I barely thought about him all day. The only conversation we had was when he texted me saying "Sorry I didn't text you good morning :(" Or something like that. Apparently his phone had died and he didn't bring the charger with him to his friend's. Cest la vie. It actually means something that he apologized for it. He's definitely not obligated to =) Good things, good things.
I'm going to write Part 3 right now. My favorite part of the story.
Also I barely thought about him all day. The only conversation we had was when he texted me saying "Sorry I didn't text you good morning :(" Or something like that. Apparently his phone had died and he didn't bring the charger with him to his friend's. Cest la vie. It actually means something that he apologized for it. He's definitely not obligated to =) Good things, good things.
I'm going to write Part 3 right now. My favorite part of the story.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
moc.topsgolb.yaDsenitnelaV
Happy SAD! Yup. Happy sad.
Anyways, I love the idea of today. I feel like on a Valentine's day, everyone else feels the love that I feel everyday. And I don't say that in a "look-at-how-great-I-am" kind of way. I just tend to feel a lot.
Again, all my worrying was in vein. Versus artery? Let me try again:
All my worrying was in vain. There we go. I woke up this morning and thought "What if he didn't text me for Valentine's Day? What if he never texts me for Valentine's Day?" And of course I did the rational thing- fell back asleep. I dreamed that we were at a cafe, and my new crazy RA was there, and he called me "love", as in "Hello love! How are you?"
All that to say I woke up thinking about him scared that he forgot my existance.
Nope. All for naught. I had two texts on my phone, one from Nicole L and one from him "Happy valentines day :)" Best thing ever to wake up to. We talked all day. He got in some fight with his parents, got really pissed at his dad, and packed his bags and left the house to go live at his friend's dormroom for a while. Poor thing. I know what I'm getting him for Valentine's Day too =) There's a bunch of ideas, I have to sift through everything and pick out a winner.
And finally, today I told him that I love waking up to get a text from him. So let's see how much he cares when I turn on my phone tomorrow morning!
Anyways, I love the idea of today. I feel like on a Valentine's day, everyone else feels the love that I feel everyday. And I don't say that in a "look-at-how-great-I-am" kind of way. I just tend to feel a lot.
Again, all my worrying was in vein. Versus artery? Let me try again:
All my worrying was in vain. There we go. I woke up this morning and thought "What if he didn't text me for Valentine's Day? What if he never texts me for Valentine's Day?" And of course I did the rational thing- fell back asleep. I dreamed that we were at a cafe, and my new crazy RA was there, and he called me "love", as in "Hello love! How are you?"
All that to say I woke up thinking about him scared that he forgot my existance.
Nope. All for naught. I had two texts on my phone, one from Nicole L and one from him "Happy valentines day :)" Best thing ever to wake up to. We talked all day. He got in some fight with his parents, got really pissed at his dad, and packed his bags and left the house to go live at his friend's dormroom for a while. Poor thing. I know what I'm getting him for Valentine's Day too =) There's a bunch of ideas, I have to sift through everything and pick out a winner.
And finally, today I told him that I love waking up to get a text from him. So let's see how much he cares when I turn on my phone tomorrow morning!
Valentine's Day
Singles Awareness Day. That's today. Well it's only been Valentines day for the past twenty-some minutes but still, it counts. It's like 3:30 for Ben so I wasn't expecting any sort of text message or anything obviously. I just am scared that I'll go through all day tomorrow and he won't text me at all. On Valentine's Day. All he has to say is "Hey :)" to me and I'll be happy as a clam. So...fingers crossed!
I don't want to initiate because so far I've initiated a good 3/4ths of the conversations. And I don't want him to know how much I like him because that would potentially wind up with me crying in my dorm room and writing a song called "Deja Vu". Ooh I like that idea...well at least I've found the silver lining on the thundercloud headed my direction.
Okay I need to stop being negative. He started the only conversation we had today. What am I freaking out about.
Also he said to me less than a week ago "You can always trust me." And he meant it too.
He's also told me that I am the only person for him. Well more on that later =)
I don't want to initiate because so far I've initiated a good 3/4ths of the conversations. And I don't want him to know how much I like him because that would potentially wind up with me crying in my dorm room and writing a song called "Deja Vu". Ooh I like that idea...well at least I've found the silver lining on the thundercloud headed my direction.
Okay I need to stop being negative. He started the only conversation we had today. What am I freaking out about.
Also he said to me less than a week ago "You can always trust me." And he meant it too.
He's also told me that I am the only person for him. Well more on that later =)
+1 Fear
I get scared. Especially when a day goes by and he doesn't text me.
Well that's not true, I woke up and sat in bed for ten minutes because I was scared that I was going to look at my phone and not have a text message from him. Turns out I did, he was bored on the train and needed something to do. So we talked a little bit but then after he arrived at his destination we stopped talking. So basically once he has something else to do, I fall behind as a negative-priority. Cool.
I can tell I'm just being dramatic, but at the same time it's a legitimate fear dwelling inside of me. He's already dumped me once. Who's to say he won't do it again?
Well that's not true, I woke up and sat in bed for ten minutes because I was scared that I was going to look at my phone and not have a text message from him. Turns out I did, he was bored on the train and needed something to do. So we talked a little bit but then after he arrived at his destination we stopped talking. So basically once he has something else to do, I fall behind as a negative-priority. Cool.
I can tell I'm just being dramatic, but at the same time it's a legitimate fear dwelling inside of me. He's already dumped me once. Who's to say he won't do it again?
Monday, February 13, 2012
lolz txt it
I'm putting the novel on pause and blogging a bit on what's happening right now. (By the way, as of today, February 12th, we're dating and I know I'm starting to fall in love)
We texted all day today. I'm going to put a bit of our conversation up for documentation purposes.
C- Hello!
B- Good morning sunshine!
C- How's day two of being quarantined at the Strat?
B- Taylor is back! Haha
C- Thank god. You were going crazy haha
B- I really was
C- If only I was there...what have you been up to?
B- Well I just woke up and now I am going to buy wine with Taylor...Haha and there are new people moving in today
C- Classy! I have a question.
B- What?
C- Are you a virgin? Because you've told me two different things
B- With men yes with women no
C- Got it
B- Is that bad?
C- No not at all! I'm the whore of the Strat so who am I to judge haha
B- No you're not!
-fast forward-
B- What are you up to?
C- Well we had a 6-man sleepover last night and I'm just about to leave. I invited someone over to hang out tonight and he's already at my house waiting for me haha fail.
B- Ohh how was your orgy?
C- It was super fun! Thanks for asking =)
B- Good! I hope you didn't catch anything :)
[[this was a reference to when he almost gave me mono]]
C- hahahaha It was actually pretty awkward last night one of the guys made a gay joke about me and I said "So what if I'm gay? What's wrong with that?" and he replies "other than it being wrong and a Biblical sin? Nothing."
B-You should ask to hook up with him. Those types of people are so gay he would get so turned on
C- Right. I really just want to go hook up with other people right now that we're together again. I don't think I ever could.
B- Ohhhh that's just the answer I was looking for :):):):)
C- Honestly? I wouldn't want to. Nobody else is as cute as you Ben
B- I wish you were here. I wish you could sleep in my bed tonight.
C- Me too. Last night everyone was playing videogames for hours and I was sitting in the back of the room reading my blog and fb stalking you haha
B- Ohh :((
C- What's the sad face for
B- Because you're too cute. I miss your face.
C- I want to lie on your bed again and forget about everything and everyone else
B- I know I want to spend the break with you
C- If I ever got the chance to show you around Pasadena...that would be amazing. At this point I don't care where we are I just wish I had you in my arms right now. I want to kiss you.
B- Me too. Me. Too.
C- Why are you so cute
B- Bc that's how I was born :) people can't control that!!
C- Well I'm just a bit obsessed. So you're going to have to deal with it- cuz I can't control that =)
And I am. Just a bit obsessed.
We texted all day today. I'm going to put a bit of our conversation up for documentation purposes.
C- Hello!
B- Good morning sunshine!
C- How's day two of being quarantined at the Strat?
B- Taylor is back! Haha
C- Thank god. You were going crazy haha
B- I really was
C- If only I was there...what have you been up to?
B- Well I just woke up and now I am going to buy wine with Taylor...Haha and there are new people moving in today
C- Classy! I have a question.
B- What?
C- Are you a virgin? Because you've told me two different things
B- With men yes with women no
C- Got it
B- Is that bad?
C- No not at all! I'm the whore of the Strat so who am I to judge haha
B- No you're not!
-fast forward-
B- What are you up to?
C- Well we had a 6-man sleepover last night and I'm just about to leave. I invited someone over to hang out tonight and he's already at my house waiting for me haha fail.
B- Ohh how was your orgy?
C- It was super fun! Thanks for asking =)
B- Good! I hope you didn't catch anything :)
[[this was a reference to when he almost gave me mono]]
C- hahahaha It was actually pretty awkward last night one of the guys made a gay joke about me and I said "So what if I'm gay? What's wrong with that?" and he replies "other than it being wrong and a Biblical sin? Nothing."
B-You should ask to hook up with him. Those types of people are so gay he would get so turned on
C- Right. I really just want to go hook up with other people right now that we're together again. I don't think I ever could.
B- Ohhhh that's just the answer I was looking for :):):):)
C- Honestly? I wouldn't want to. Nobody else is as cute as you Ben
B- I wish you were here. I wish you could sleep in my bed tonight.
C- Me too. Last night everyone was playing videogames for hours and I was sitting in the back of the room reading my blog and fb stalking you haha
B- Ohh :((
C- What's the sad face for
B- Because you're too cute. I miss your face.
C- I want to lie on your bed again and forget about everything and everyone else
B- I know I want to spend the break with you
C- If I ever got the chance to show you around Pasadena...that would be amazing. At this point I don't care where we are I just wish I had you in my arms right now. I want to kiss you.
B- Me too. Me. Too.
C- Why are you so cute
B- Bc that's how I was born :) people can't control that!!
C- Well I'm just a bit obsessed. So you're going to have to deal with it- cuz I can't control that =)
And I am. Just a bit obsessed.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Saturday, February 11, 2012
The Only Exception
I've got a tight grip on reality but I can't
let go of what's in front of me here.
I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up-
leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream.
The Heartbeat (Part 2)
The excitement that flowed through me as soon as those words landed...the adrenaline rush...the victorious swell coursing through my veins...I'll never forget that moment. I told him I like him too. We cuddled and talked and smiled and stared into eachothers eyes.
Have you ever had a moment of complete dehydration? Your lips are cracked and dry, your throat feels like sand, and your gums start to tingle at the thought of water. You can't even swallow because it takes so much strength to conjure the saliva. The sun is beating down on you and you cannot think about anything but getting a drink of water. Just a sip to quench your thirst, heal your lips and your tongue and your throat. Then you finally get that water bottle, squeeze off the cap, and let the ice-cold liquid flow all through you, cooling you off, replenishing your energy, restoring your life.
That's exactly what my first kiss with Ben was. Refreshing. Not just a sip of water; a river. A waterfall. So cliche and cheesy, but all of a sudden you understand why the "perfect kiss" is such an overused topic. Because it exists. It's real and it's just as perfect as anyone ever says it is.
Reirg Nimajneb / The Beginning (Part 1)
"Benjamin Grier" backwards. I figure I don't blog enough or write in my journal as much as a should, so if I make a blog about something that I know will always hold my interest, then I know I'll always remember to blog about it right? I hope...
Anyways, this kid...there's so much to write. I'm going to start with the beginning- on my other blog I wrote an entry about him immediately after he accepted my friend request on facebook way back when in early October. This is what it said:
Hi there. You're adorable. I don't think I've ever used that word to describe anything before. But you're absolutely adorable. I've easily watched over ten videos of you and I wrote a creepy message on your wall. I come in platonicy, you have my word. But can we be best friends for the rest of our lives please?
Before we had even talked, I wrote what sounds like a love letter to him. From seeing his pictures and stalking his videos. Then a couple days later in a Starbucks we facebook chatted about nothing in particular, and I wrote a second entry about him. Here's a few excerpts:
-Okay wait I'm confused. Do I like him? No. I mean yes but not really.
-I don't even like him I'm just being obsessive cuz I'm Connor. Whatever.
-I just pictured WHAT IF BEN WAS MY BARISTA!!
-We're meant to be. Friends. We're meant to be friends. I have to keep reminding myself that I don't actually like him or have any reason to.
Basically I was rambling, changing my mind, sounding like a schizo, bringing all my thought processes back to him....all the signs of liking someone. After the most meaningless conversation about nothing. I never realized this until now, but I was whipped from the start. I had no chance. No control. Literally a modern day version of love-at-first-sight.
Do I love him? No. Not yet, anyway. But I'm skipping ahead here.
So basically we were talking a bit before we got to school. And he talked about the girl he was dating for two years. And I believed that he was straight. I mean, he's way too perfect to be straight, and way deep down I knew it, but I used it as an excuse to help me not think about him as much.
But then when we got to AMDA shit went down. The first couple of weeks nothing really happened, he came to my room and hung out a couple times, whatever. The third week of school I hung out with him and Vicki and Taylor every day. Just the four of us. Watching movies, drinking, talking, etc. And I would do little flirty things, like talk to Tay about how I like shorter brown-haired boys right in front of him, or sit with my leg touching his and watch his breathing get faster. Little tests like that to see what he was made of. Turns out he's made of everything that's good in this world. For a week I would test the waters with him and try to figure out whether or not he was gay (he was still with his girlfriend back home). Taylor and Vicki would comfort me telling me how obviously gay he is and that all I need to do is wait for him to be comfortable with me.
Friday night, October 28th, we all hung out in Ben's room until 3:00 AM. He kinda crashed and the party diffused- we all went to our rooms and fell asleep. The next morning I woke up at 11:28. It was a beautiful Saturday morning with the first blanket of winters snowfall, just two days before Halloween. At 11:30 I got a text message from Ben saying "Sorry I fell asleep on you guys last night." and I said "Not a problem =)"
"Come to my room and cuddle."
It took me maybe two minutes to brush my teeth, put on deodorant, spray cologne, and rush down to room 407, just in time for me to get there and pretend like I barely cared what was happening.
We laid on his bed next to eachother, the frozen white landscape becoming increasingly thick outside his window. We talked, we joked, we cuddled. We cuddled. That's when I knew, and finally I had the balls to say it:
"I have a question. ...Why?..."
"Why what?"
"Why do you...why do you act like you like me?"
*pause*
"Because I do."
Anyways, this kid...there's so much to write. I'm going to start with the beginning- on my other blog I wrote an entry about him immediately after he accepted my friend request on facebook way back when in early October. This is what it said:
Hi there. You're adorable. I don't think I've ever used that word to describe anything before. But you're absolutely adorable. I've easily watched over ten videos of you and I wrote a creepy message on your wall. I come in platonicy, you have my word. But can we be best friends for the rest of our lives please?
Before we had even talked, I wrote what sounds like a love letter to him. From seeing his pictures and stalking his videos. Then a couple days later in a Starbucks we facebook chatted about nothing in particular, and I wrote a second entry about him. Here's a few excerpts:
-Okay wait I'm confused. Do I like him? No. I mean yes but not really.
-I don't even like him I'm just being obsessive cuz I'm Connor. Whatever.
-I just pictured WHAT IF BEN WAS MY BARISTA!!
-We're meant to be. Friends. We're meant to be friends. I have to keep reminding myself that I don't actually like him or have any reason to.
Basically I was rambling, changing my mind, sounding like a schizo, bringing all my thought processes back to him....all the signs of liking someone. After the most meaningless conversation about nothing. I never realized this until now, but I was whipped from the start. I had no chance. No control. Literally a modern day version of love-at-first-sight.
Do I love him? No. Not yet, anyway. But I'm skipping ahead here.
So basically we were talking a bit before we got to school. And he talked about the girl he was dating for two years. And I believed that he was straight. I mean, he's way too perfect to be straight, and way deep down I knew it, but I used it as an excuse to help me not think about him as much.
But then when we got to AMDA shit went down. The first couple of weeks nothing really happened, he came to my room and hung out a couple times, whatever. The third week of school I hung out with him and Vicki and Taylor every day. Just the four of us. Watching movies, drinking, talking, etc. And I would do little flirty things, like talk to Tay about how I like shorter brown-haired boys right in front of him, or sit with my leg touching his and watch his breathing get faster. Little tests like that to see what he was made of. Turns out he's made of everything that's good in this world. For a week I would test the waters with him and try to figure out whether or not he was gay (he was still with his girlfriend back home). Taylor and Vicki would comfort me telling me how obviously gay he is and that all I need to do is wait for him to be comfortable with me.
Friday night, October 28th, we all hung out in Ben's room until 3:00 AM. He kinda crashed and the party diffused- we all went to our rooms and fell asleep. The next morning I woke up at 11:28. It was a beautiful Saturday morning with the first blanket of winters snowfall, just two days before Halloween. At 11:30 I got a text message from Ben saying "Sorry I fell asleep on you guys last night." and I said "Not a problem =)"
"Come to my room and cuddle."
It took me maybe two minutes to brush my teeth, put on deodorant, spray cologne, and rush down to room 407, just in time for me to get there and pretend like I barely cared what was happening.
We laid on his bed next to eachother, the frozen white landscape becoming increasingly thick outside his window. We talked, we joked, we cuddled. We cuddled. That's when I knew, and finally I had the balls to say it:
"I have a question. ...Why?..."
"Why what?"
"Why do you...why do you act like you like me?"
*pause*
"Because I do."
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